KaridaadoDe kathhuriyam
MuruDaadoDe maLayajangaLam
KonkidoDaem smarachaapavan iLikayvare?
MaruLe, pollameye laesu nallara maiyyoL..!!
As the musk is pallid
As the sandal is crooked
As the rainbow is arched
Does anyone detest ‘em coz their looks are horrid?
Idiot, the more grotesque they turn out to be
The more loveable one’s lover would be …!!
… is what the beautiful queen Amrutamati replies to her maid, when the maid asks her why she is so madly in love with that mahout, who is so ugly that he was named after his ugliness (his name would be Ashtavanka, meaning crookedness in eight organs. Ashta=eight, vanka=crooked), and also in spite of her being married to a handsome, loving king; in spite of she being so divinely beautiful and intelligent, in spite of her having all the wealth, all the worldly joys at her disposal.
The above is an excerpt from Janna’s Yashodhara Charita, a great poem written about 800 years ago (please remember this point. I’d be using this somewhere in the end). The mahout would be very ugly but was blessed with a great voice. On one moonless night, the queen hears a song being sung in a melodious voice. She gets so attracted by the voice that decides to step out of the palace and find out who the singer is. The voice guides her to the elephant-stable where she meets the mahout and instantly falls in love with him, despite of his ugliness. After this, she starts visiting him every night and their sexual escapades continue. One day she visits him a bit delayed and he, tired of waiting for her and out of anger and frustration, kicks and whips her. But she’d still apologize and continues to serve him with what she was there for. (It is interesting to note that our ancestors were aware of SDM/BDSM practices at least 800 years ago!) When the queen’s maid comes to know this, she asks the questions being stated in the first paragraph and the queen replies as narrated above. Their story takes a lot of twists and turns, birth and rebirth scenes and narrating all that here would be nothing but an act of foolishness.
I had this poem in high school. I guess some 8-10 stanzas were there. But I remembered only these 4 lines out of all the stanzas. I hated this when it was in my curriculum coz I always hated studying the crap that was mandatory for me to mug up and pollute my already endangered-numbered brain cells. So I never bothered to figure out what is the meaning of the poem but just focused on mugging up what my teacher taught us and replicate the same in the exam. But now, I’m inclined towards reading these kinda works (though I don’t understand them) coz there is no restriction and it is not mandatory for me to mug them up and vomit the same in my answer paper. I’m doing this out of my interest. Hence it appears so awesome! Some recent incident made me remember these lines and I bought the entire work. And even after reading that, I remember only these 4 lines. I’ve tried to translate those lines into English. You can see my struggle for finding the rhyme and holding the meaning in the translation. I hope you got the gist of what the poem conveys by reading the translation. If you still don’t understand, then please contact me in person so that I can pound ya…
Anyway, neither the poem nor its characters is the focal point here. I just used this as a prelude to narrate the stuff that I wanted to say.
There are many things that astonish me to some extent. There are certain things that astonish me to a moderate level. And there are a few things that astonish me a lot! And human psyche is one among the subjects that I can classify under the last category i.e. it astonishes me a lot! Each of us thinks so differently, our tastes vary, our choices clash, our interests differ, our preferences contrast and our opinions collide. We all are so different just like the stripes on the zebras. Let’s analyze the human psyche under two circumstances – (i) Friendship (ii) Love.
When it comes to friendship, most of the times, we make friends out of “chance”. All my friends are from school/college or I got to know them at work. Only a few I made out of “choice”. I guess it is always difficult to find a person of our choice. We are fortunate if we’re able to find a person who matches at least 30-40% of our frequency. And the people I got to know out of choice, stayed (staying) with me for a long time. And I think it is the same case with most of us. Well, that was about friendship. But when it comes to love, most of the times it would be the reverse scenario! That is, we find our mates out of “choice” but not out of chance, as against the case with friendship (I’m not talking about the ancient times wherein the girl didn’t have any other option but to go with the choice of her parents. I’m talking about the modern times where people from both the genders are free to decide what is best for them). We will (‘we’ as individuals) always be responsible for the choice we’ve made and no one else would be held responsible for that. And I can bet that we do invest a hell lot of time to find out whether our partner is actually meant for us or not, whether we share common interests or not, whether we both as a couple, lead the life together or not. And after all this observing, thinking, talking, showing interest in each other and all that gets over, we decide to take the matters ahead i.e. we either continue to be friends or decide to be boy/girl friends, depending on our respective gender. Breaking up wouldn’t arise here coz nobody invests too much time on a person whom they didn’t like in the first instance itself…
So when a person chooses his mate, it is by default understood that he likes his choice, he is confidence of his decision, he trusts upon his selection, and if he is a bit abnormal (‘eccentric’ or ‘lunatic’ wouldn’t sound all that polished), he can go to any extent or do any stupid thing for the sake of his mate and vice versa. So both the boy and the girl like each other and they decide to live happily ever after, contributing as best as they can to the ever-increasing Indian population … is what you are thinking that I’d say, then you’re wrong. I’ve got something else to say…
MuruDaadoDe maLayajangaLam
KonkidoDaem smarachaapavan iLikayvare?
MaruLe, pollameye laesu nallara maiyyoL..!!
As the musk is pallid
As the sandal is crooked
As the rainbow is arched
Does anyone detest ‘em coz their looks are horrid?
Idiot, the more grotesque they turn out to be
The more loveable one’s lover would be …!!
… is what the beautiful queen Amrutamati replies to her maid, when the maid asks her why she is so madly in love with that mahout, who is so ugly that he was named after his ugliness (his name would be Ashtavanka, meaning crookedness in eight organs. Ashta=eight, vanka=crooked), and also in spite of her being married to a handsome, loving king; in spite of she being so divinely beautiful and intelligent, in spite of her having all the wealth, all the worldly joys at her disposal.
The above is an excerpt from Janna’s Yashodhara Charita, a great poem written about 800 years ago (please remember this point. I’d be using this somewhere in the end). The mahout would be very ugly but was blessed with a great voice. On one moonless night, the queen hears a song being sung in a melodious voice. She gets so attracted by the voice that decides to step out of the palace and find out who the singer is. The voice guides her to the elephant-stable where she meets the mahout and instantly falls in love with him, despite of his ugliness. After this, she starts visiting him every night and their sexual escapades continue. One day she visits him a bit delayed and he, tired of waiting for her and out of anger and frustration, kicks and whips her. But she’d still apologize and continues to serve him with what she was there for. (It is interesting to note that our ancestors were aware of SDM/BDSM practices at least 800 years ago!) When the queen’s maid comes to know this, she asks the questions being stated in the first paragraph and the queen replies as narrated above. Their story takes a lot of twists and turns, birth and rebirth scenes and narrating all that here would be nothing but an act of foolishness.
I had this poem in high school. I guess some 8-10 stanzas were there. But I remembered only these 4 lines out of all the stanzas. I hated this when it was in my curriculum coz I always hated studying the crap that was mandatory for me to mug up and pollute my already endangered-numbered brain cells. So I never bothered to figure out what is the meaning of the poem but just focused on mugging up what my teacher taught us and replicate the same in the exam. But now, I’m inclined towards reading these kinda works (though I don’t understand them) coz there is no restriction and it is not mandatory for me to mug them up and vomit the same in my answer paper. I’m doing this out of my interest. Hence it appears so awesome! Some recent incident made me remember these lines and I bought the entire work. And even after reading that, I remember only these 4 lines. I’ve tried to translate those lines into English. You can see my struggle for finding the rhyme and holding the meaning in the translation. I hope you got the gist of what the poem conveys by reading the translation. If you still don’t understand, then please contact me in person so that I can pound ya…
Anyway, neither the poem nor its characters is the focal point here. I just used this as a prelude to narrate the stuff that I wanted to say.
There are many things that astonish me to some extent. There are certain things that astonish me to a moderate level. And there are a few things that astonish me a lot! And human psyche is one among the subjects that I can classify under the last category i.e. it astonishes me a lot! Each of us thinks so differently, our tastes vary, our choices clash, our interests differ, our preferences contrast and our opinions collide. We all are so different just like the stripes on the zebras. Let’s analyze the human psyche under two circumstances – (i) Friendship (ii) Love.
When it comes to friendship, most of the times, we make friends out of “chance”. All my friends are from school/college or I got to know them at work. Only a few I made out of “choice”. I guess it is always difficult to find a person of our choice. We are fortunate if we’re able to find a person who matches at least 30-40% of our frequency. And the people I got to know out of choice, stayed (staying) with me for a long time. And I think it is the same case with most of us. Well, that was about friendship. But when it comes to love, most of the times it would be the reverse scenario! That is, we find our mates out of “choice” but not out of chance, as against the case with friendship (I’m not talking about the ancient times wherein the girl didn’t have any other option but to go with the choice of her parents. I’m talking about the modern times where people from both the genders are free to decide what is best for them). We will (‘we’ as individuals) always be responsible for the choice we’ve made and no one else would be held responsible for that. And I can bet that we do invest a hell lot of time to find out whether our partner is actually meant for us or not, whether we share common interests or not, whether we both as a couple, lead the life together or not. And after all this observing, thinking, talking, showing interest in each other and all that gets over, we decide to take the matters ahead i.e. we either continue to be friends or decide to be boy/girl friends, depending on our respective gender. Breaking up wouldn’t arise here coz nobody invests too much time on a person whom they didn’t like in the first instance itself…
So when a person chooses his mate, it is by default understood that he likes his choice, he is confidence of his decision, he trusts upon his selection, and if he is a bit abnormal (‘eccentric’ or ‘lunatic’ wouldn’t sound all that polished), he can go to any extent or do any stupid thing for the sake of his mate and vice versa. So both the boy and the girl like each other and they decide to live happily ever after, contributing as best as they can to the ever-increasing Indian population … is what you are thinking that I’d say, then you’re wrong. I’ve got something else to say…
Hence under normal circumstances, when a couple decides for mutual courtship, they must truly be liking each other, must be knowing each other’s choices and preferences, must be aware of what would make one happy or go sulky, and how to correct if anything of that sort happens. In short, they must have “understood” each other. Fine, the frequencies match and they come together! They both are very happy with each other, they enjoy each other’s company, they have a good time whenever the time permits (as the Bard says “But passion lends them power, time means, to meet; Temp’ring extremities with extreme sweet..!!"), they get to know each others’ family, and they think that they’ve made a scrupulous decision. It is icing on the cake when both of them are educated, “well-read”, intelligent, working in a reputed company, and earning well (the guy at least). Well, All's Well That Ends Well!
After spending years like this, one day the guy discovers that his girl has been cheating on him! The scenario, to the letter, is the story written by Janna 800 years ago! It is as if Janna had foreseen this thing happening 800 years ago! (Hats off to him!) This girl is going out with another guy (simultaneously), in spite of having a caring, loving and devoted boyfriend who has already made a lot of sacrifices and compromises in order to see her happy. And in return, she has been constantly cheating on him. The guy realizes that it is now too late to get her back and to love her with the same intensity with which he always used to love her. So he decides to break up with her (which any sane person would do). And before breaking up, when he asks her why she did so, her reply was nothing but the short and sweet - “I don’t Know!”… which of course was coupled with the usual timely crying tactic that all girls are bestowed with…
This is where exactly I wanted to arrive at! This is what intrigues me the most! The most difficult thing here is not finding out who cheated whom but “WHY” they did so?? This bloody human psyche psyches me out. What would be the reason for her to cheat on him? As already being stated, she was beautiful, intelligent, well-read, looked respectable, and most importantly, she was in love with him. Even he loved her sincerely (I can tell this coz even today I see the traces of that fossilized-love in his eyes). They made a good pair. But what made her still go for another guy? Was it for money? Sex? Looks? Or any other trait of him that she got attracted to? And if at all she had to go for another guy, why didn’t she dump the first one? Being so intelligent and full of common sense, didn’t she think that handling two guys simultaneously will make her something else? What if he had done the same with her? What if he had impregnated her and dumped her thereafter? Well, I don’t see much difference here coz even she impregnated him (!?). She “used” him, impregnated him with her memories and left. If he had done so, she at least had an option to go for an abortion. But even that option is void for him coz memories can never be aborted. They can only be delivered. They get delivered as many times as they wish to take over the mind. They never get subdued but only get strengthened. He has to carry that crap as long as he is alive. Forget all the other shit, why doesn’t she tell the “actual reason" for cheating on him? Does she really not know it? Or is it just that she doesn’t want to reveal? Queen Amrutamati had a reason. She fell for mahout’s voice at least but what did this girl fall for? That too when she is in love with someone else? Was this entire love thing from her end nothing but a drama? Was she using him as a ‘stepney’ in case if something goes wrong? Or was she in love with him out of “chance” but not of “choice”? …
Well, too many questions which fortunately, I’m not supposed to answer for. I’ve witnessed many stories of this kind but mentioned one here. And hey, let me make it clear that I’m not woman-hater. But in fact, I love them…especially the beautiful ones! :-) It is very obvious and evident that there has been equal contribution to spouse cheating from both the genders (if I’m not wrong, we men hold a major market share in it!) This cheating thing had always been there, right from the beginning of life on our planet. I’m using the above characters just to narrate the story. And being a male, I’ve supported and upheld my own gender, that’s it!
I think that it is the animal instinct that drives us to go for adventures like this in life. We go for it may be coz we quickly get bored with the everyday stuff (especially when we know that the everyday stuff will always be there for us. E.g. wife!) and are constantly on the lookout for a change. And when the opportunity comes, we just go for it. The present day world provides us with a hell lot of opportunities. When there are too many choices around, we just want to go ahead and experience them – either all at a time; or one by one; or may be two at a time…
But I’d truly love to get the answers to my questions being raised above from the people who have dumped/cheated on their partners for the reason “I Don’t Know”. It would be a wonderful source of information in understanding the functionality of the human psyche. You know, listening it straight from the horse’s mouth always makes sense. Well, if I’m that interested in understanding the functionality of the human psyche, then why I’m not shooting the same questions at myself!?? Well, the answer to which would be – “I don’t Know!” :-)
Am I not a smartass!? Happy reading! ;-)
Yours Truly, 13th June 2010
Sieur Clubin 08:30pm
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